


there's a brave new world raging inside of me

by dxncxdxncx



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Coming Out, Gen, I Wrote This While Listening to Against Me!, Lowercase, Misgendering, Trans Character, Trans Female Character, Trans TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), its bc he doesnt know dw, no beta we die like ghostbur, no relationship bc wtf thats weird theyre minors, trans author
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 13:53:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28546668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dxncxdxncx/pseuds/dxncxdxncx
Summary: clementine has been thinking. a lot. she knows she's a girl, she knows she's not "tommy," but she doesn't know how to say it.in which clementine comes out to tubbo as a trans girltitle from fuckmylife666 by against me!
Relationships: Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit
Comments: 10
Kudos: 423





	there's a brave new world raging inside of me

**Author's Note:**

> oh no, there's an essay due tomorrow! *writes fanfiction cutely*

hiding a secret isn’t actually that hard. unless what you’re hiding is your entire identity.  
  


how clementine realized she was trans wasn’t anything like a movie scene. it was pretty anticlimactic actually. when she was fifteen she looked up what the word transgender meant, and was like, “oh shit, that’s me."  
  


since then she’d been clementine, she/her in her mind. in her mind, being the key phrase.  
  


she hadn’t came out to anyone in her life. sure, she had a twitter disguised as a stan account, but it wasn’t the same. she wanted to hear her friends call her clementine. she wanted to be called “big woman” instead of “big man.” it was the little things that made the biggest difference.  
  


most importantly, she wanted her best friend to know. tubbo calling clementine by her deadname hurt more than any other person could hurt her. clementine didn’t blame him though. how could she? it wasn’t tubbo’s fault that she was a coward.  
  


clementine had actually tried to tell him multiple times. but at the end she chickened out every time. there was just too much pressure, too much to lose. deep down she knew tubbo would accept her with open arms, but that didn’t stop the nagging voice in her mind telling her how much tubbo would hate her if she tried to come out.  
  


today was yet another day that clementine told herself she would finally come out to tubbo. she just hoped that she wouldn’t scare herself out of saying it, yet again.

  
maybe writing the words down will make it easier, she thought. she pulled out a pen and scribbled on a sticky note, “i’m trans. my name is clementine and my pronouns are she/her.” that definitely didn’t make her feel any less nervous, but it certainly did make the words seem a lot more real. “you are a big woman clem!!!! you can do it”, she added at the end. that kind of helps, she guessed.  
  


if you had asked clementine was nervous, she probably would have yelled you about how obviously not nervous she was, and called you a bitch. but nobody was asking her anything then, and she knew for a fact she was nervous.  
  


and so, she decided to do what any other reasonable person would have done if they were in her situation. procrastinate. clementine pulled out a bottle of clear nail polish hidden in the corner of a drawer. putting on nail polish was one of those little things that made her feel truly like she was a girl. it was small enough that no one would notice, but made enough difference that she felt so much better. plus, she wouldn’t get tempted to chew on her nails that way.

  
clementine opened discord to see if tubbo was online, and he was. he was in a vc alone in the dream smp server, so she joined him.

  
“hey big t, how are you doing?”  
  
“i’m streaming, how about you tommy?”

  
tommy. that’s why clementine was there, but it has to wait now, she guessed. at least mindlessly chatting with tubbo could ease her nerves.

  
when tubbo ended the stream, the only thing clementine wanted was for it to not be awkward.  
  


“can we move to a call? instead of the vc?”  
  
“sure thing, wait a sec.”  
  
when they moved calls, clementine was the one who spoke first.  
  
“so um. toby. i wanted to tell you something.”  
  
“oh, okay, you know you can tell me anything tommy.”  
  
“well, yeah about that last bit…” she chuckled. “i’m not tommy.”  
  
“what do you mean?” saying that tubbo was confused would definitely be an understatement. clementine took a deep, shaky breath and finally said the words.  
  
“i’m trans, toby. i’m a girl.” she exhaled. she didn’t know if it was more from relief or fear.  
  
“oh.”  
  


what the hell did ‘oh.’ mean?! oh god, what is she supposed to do now?  
  


“i thought you’d stolen someone’s identity or something, i was worried for a bit there!” clementine burst out laughing.  
  
“what the fuck tubbo, you can’t scare me like that!”  
  
“sorry, sorry, but seriously, thank you so much for telling me t- wait, what’s your name and pronouns?”  
  
“clementine. she/her.”  
  
“that’s a very cool name! i’m so glad you trusted me enough to tell me this. does anyone else know?”  
  
“no… not yet. you’re the first one i told. i want to tell the others, at least the dream smp, soon.”  
  
“cool, so do i not refer to you as clementine with other people?”  
  
“no, but soon, i’m hoping.”  
  
“i’ll support you no matter what, don’t worry.”  
  
“thank you so much, toby, i love you.”  
  
“i love you too clementine… wait a second, does that mean you’re a lesbian?”

  
“ha, yeah! lesbianinnit is canon!”  
  
“now that’s poggers.”

**Author's Note:**

> guess who doesn't know how to write endings. it's me.
> 
> also, this was my first ever proper fanfiction, i hope you enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it
> 
> thanks for reading <3


End file.
